Today I woke up after dreaming abt Zul... Like it's been ages since I dreamt abt him.. but it's nice meeting him in my dreams.. even if it's juz dreams!=)

Cant believe we r juz abt a day til new yr..time flies so fast n so far..

gd nite peepz

Unless you've been leaving in Russia, The Artic or somewhere underneath rox, you'd already definitely hear abt Tsunamis (The killer tidal waves)

I've sat for over an hr.. with my eyes glued to the tube.. watching over and over clippings of how the Tsunami had hit Phuket.. and listening to the recall of the survivors...and still.. I am feeling deeply abt this most recent tragedy. It is reported that those who have died in INdonesia are mostly children.. Oh god...

Isn't it amazing that the epicentre of the tsunami, located in Northern Sumatra could still radiate to Sri Lanka, India, Thailand, Malaysia, Myanmar? I mean.. this is what they mean counting ur blessings.. coz if u actually removed peninsular m'sia and the republic of indonesia.. we wud have been definitely been WASHED away...

The last time I heard abt Tsunamis were close 2 4 yrs ago during Geography lessons. And now tat it is hitting so close to home.. did onli dis knowledge came in useful.It's so scary to know that waves.. frm the beautiful ocean cud rise to a height of 5-10 m ... and wats worse is that Phuket, being Thailand's revenue(tourism) needs 3-6 mths to be rebuild... I mean think abt it? We're talking not onli abt lost lives here.. we're talking abt homes.. jobs..ECONOMICS.. what are these pple gonna do now that this Tsunami have hit them?

The Bombing of Bali is still pretty clear in some pple's mind.. and now dis happened. The world that we're living in are so much in danger, both naturally and intentionally. I mean, we Singaporeans are lucky...

And I know this sounds funnie.. but if my parents dont object, I'd definitely love to volunteer for the Tsunami Aide. At least I could do my part in caring for those hurt. It must be traumatising to suddenly watch that the normal swash n backwash are actually moving sideways and increasing in height.. It's like the normal ocean blue turns a murky brown, taking lives with it... It is not the most natural thing to be watching sth so surreal 1 moment, onli to run for ur dear lives the next.

I'm currently living thinking that this new yr is gonna bring alot of meaning in my life. Forget partying and counting down. To those who are planning on getting drunk and wasted..I hope you have already realised the weight of the events in recent time s .. Not to say we shud always be trapped in the past..But, merely.. Juz counting urself lucky and to keep urself safe n healthy wen u still have the time and chance.

Love always,
Meow

Usah kau berpura
Di sebalik kata
Kerana ku tahu siapa diriku

Tak perlu merayu
Dengan pujukanmu
Biarkanlah saja semuanya pergi

Cukuplah sekali
Kau menghiris hati
Menghancurkan kasih
Yang telah lama terbina

Seandainya masih
Ada cinta lagi
Lupakan oh sayang
Hasrat dan perasaanmu


Rindu nan membara
Nyala dan membelai jiwa
Tiada berteman
Sepinya berpanjangan


Resah dan gelora
Jadi sahabat derita
Berakhirlah sandiwara
Kisah dusta dan dilema
Pintaku semoga kau sedar
Kesilapanmu

Kini hanya duka
Bersulamkan pasrah
Titis airmata
Tak lagi bererti

Namun di hatiku
Terukir namamu
Menjadi memori
Kekalnya abadi

You know pple always use the term LETTING GO.. when what they shud realli say is GIVING UP. For those who don't understand y.. it's coz..Letting go is the term used to finally release ur hold on something/someone who is RIGHTFULLY yours in the 1st place wheareas giving up is juz moving away frm something/sum1 that you want badly, but was nvr urs in the 1st place.

As this new yr is coming along.. I'd like to let go of my emotional excess baggage.. Time to move on from those who constantly mk me feel bad abt myself.. and time to dress to kill! haha.. not sure if i cud party it all night tho.. haha..

hmm.. my cousin's b'dae falls on Christmas... so in a way every christmas I get broke but I have sumwhr to spend it..It mks things kinda cooler so wen pple ask..I can juz sae, Im spending it wif my family*winkz* Aniwae.. I have a poem:

You constantly get hurt by the words that I say..
Always disapproving my opinionated ways..
Why m i on the receiving end of your angst, your sadness and ur misery?
I'm tired of absorbing all dis vibes, can't you see?

Why can't you juz be nice to me?
Instead of behaving like the world owe's everything to you?
Why don't you juz let it be?
Coz if you can't.. then I guess it shud be through.

I'm tired of hearing your whims and your whines..
I'm tired of seeing you talk abt me as if you were mine.
Have you forgotten?
Pls recall what I wanted. It was bout a moment..

Pls pick up the pieces after you fall..
So that I can now stand tall..
I nd my breathing space..
W/out you occupying every inch of this maze ..

....and in e festive season ..here's a nice Britney Spear's song....................
Last night I took a walk in the snow
Couples holding hands, places to go
Seems like everyone but me is in love
Santa can you hear me?

I signed my letter that I sealed with a kiss
I sent it off, and it just said this:
I know exactly what I want this year
Santa can you hear me?
I want my baby, baby
I want someone to love me, someone to hold
Maybe, baby
He'll be all my own in a big red bow

Santa can you hear me?
I have been so good this year
and all I want is one thing
Tell me my true love is near
He's all I want, just for me
Underneath my Christmas tree
I'll be waiting here
Santa, that's my only wish this year

Christmas eve, I just can't sleep
Would I be wrong in taking a peek?
Cuz I heard that you're coming to town
Santa can you hear me?

I really hope that you're on your way
With something special for me in your sleigh
Oh please make my wish come true
Santa can you hear me?
I want my baby, baby
I want someone to love me, someone to hold
Maybe, baby
We'll be all alone, under the mistletoe

Santa can you hear me?
I have been so good this year
And all I want is one thing
Tell me my true love is near
He's all I want, just for me
Underneath my Christmas tree
I'll be waiting here
Santa, that's my only wish this year

I hope my letter reaches you in time (oh yeah)
Bring me a love I can call all mine (oh yeah)
Cuz I have been so good this year (oh)
I can't be alone under the mistletoe...
He's all I want in a big red bow

Santa can you hear me?
I have been so good this year
And all I want is one thing (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Tell me my true love is near
He's all I want, just for me
Underneath my Christmas tree
I'll be waiting here (oh yeah)
Santa, that's my only wish this year

Ahh...Oh Santa, can you hear me, oh, oh Santa
Well he's all I want, just for me
Underneath my Christmas tree
I'll be waiting here (oh yeah)
Santa that's my only wish this year

Santa that's my only wish this year

I vomitted juz now in town.. and dis malay couple was darting me weird looks..to which i said: ASAL? TK PERNAH NAMPAK ORG MUNTAH?!

I don't know what they tot and I certainly don't wish to think abt it..
Aniwae, I ate @ fish & Co (the glasshse).. and I think I ate too much la, tats y I puked it out..

So instead of going hm like b4 11. It tk me an hr later to finally reached hm swt hm=) [I bought sour plums n mineral water on e way]..

& here's what I bought to day

1. Body butter from body shop. (Mango & Honeydew)
2. T-shirt from top shop
3. Cleo wif cover of taufiq
4. Neutrogena facial foam
5. UGNY nail polish

I cant remember what else, but that's abt it la..

I'm still wondering if i shud perm me hair..XD

If today..I lost the things that I had..
It wouldn't be so bad..
Coz at least I tot I had you..

It's not like you left..
No.. But u started reminicising..and I knew den that my words had gone deaf.

Maybe you've finally moved on..
Im finally glad.. tho your heart, I might have torn..

Sorry for the harsh words..
It's juz that I didnt want you to get jaded.

Thanks for the time, efforts n tot u put in.
Coz at least now, you don't have to think abt what might have been.

To you whom I've hurt..I'm sure you understand

Terlalu singkat hubungan ini
Belum pun sempat melakar rindu
Baru semalam mimpi dicipta
Mengapa mendung melanda sukma

Kaulah segalanya maka digubah
Ketika cinta masih di dada
Punahlah jua kini akhirnya

Entah mengapa hati bertanya
Mengapa kasih terlerai kini
Ku tak salahkan.. dirimu sayang
Lantaran takdir sudah tersurat

Punahlah jua kini akhirnya

Guys can be lame & pathetic. I'm sure to most gerlz dis sentiment's arent new. Im talking generally of coz. Or maybe like 1 out of 100. I mean dis species of the guys have the following characters:

- Think they own you juz coz you guys spent some time together
- Become INSTANT PARASITES (after they've made up their mind they r chasing u)
- Can't accept it that a girl didn't call (Do they actualli know thr's life other den dem?)
- Fucking bloody emotional.
- Whiny.

I hope in my entire life.. this kinda guys wont mk things too difficult for me.I mean what does he think this is? THat Im married to him? calling me and asking me to go home, or dont come hm too late? Oh god. I'm not saying I didnt even LIKE him. I did. But he's taking every sense of breath from my life. Hah. And he's forever going on n on n on..
Like have they heard thr's such thing called PERSONAL SPACE? I want my life back. And to those who is FEELING dis. Stop thinking everything is about you. Reality check: THE WORLD DOESN'T REVOLVE AROUND YOU ALONE. So quit asking.. and start doing sth productive with your time.


Where you are seems to be
As far as an eternity
Outstretched arms open hearts
And if it never ends then when do we start?
I'll never leave you behind
Or treat you unkind
I know you understand
And with a tear in my eye
Give me the sweetest goodbye
That I ever did receive

Pushing forward and arching back
Bring me closer to heart attack
Say goodbye and just fly away
When you comeback
I have some things to say

How does it feel to know you never have to be alone
When you get home
There must be someplace here that only you and I could go
So I can show you how I
Dream away everyday
Try so hard to disregard
The rhythm of the rain that drops
And coincides with the beating of my heart

I'll never leave you behind
Or treat you unkind
I know you understand
And with a tear in my eye
Give me the sweetest goodbye
That I ever did receive

Pushing forward and arching back
Bring me closer to heart attack
Say goodbye and just fly away
When you comeback
I have some things to say

How does it feel to know you never have to be alone
When you get home
There must be someplace here that only you and I could go
So I can show you how I feel


p/s: And to those who have used the words as MEAN, UNKIND and their synonyms to describe me?.. it's time you actually deal with it. You can say anithing you wanna say..coz to me,I'll nvr lose anything. And abt MOVING ON? I'm doing juz that.And don't deny you are being a sissy.. you bloody puss! Meowwww~

The thing about having semestral holz is that weekends or not, it doesnt make ani difference, UNTIL..you go in2 town n realise u shud juz haf stayed home.

Tats exactly what happened to me on Fri nighT! I tell u, e crowd is crazy. PLUS it was raining cats n dogs.. Luckily it wasnt tat way wen I was @ e beach, else I'd be cursing as hell now..

I ran in e pouring, cold rain.. sharing a fairly small umbrella wif Ali. The sight is somewhat unthinkable.. den wen we arrived @ Swensen's crown prince, thr wasnt even ani line! And I do not know what the manager was thinking... it's like pple kept asking, how do we secure a table.. tsk tsk..den wen we were finally seated, he gaf us a seat for 4. Like what the hell was he thinking?!Thr's onli 2 of us! oh god.

In the 1st place..if that gerl over @ fish & co hadnt told us their laast order was over, we wud haf been saved frm getting wet..not too mention e cab fare n 1 hr of waiting.. sheesh.Ah well, a memorable experience

So came Saturday morning (yes.. Ive been waking up early.. even I dont u/stand y).. I told my mom we shud haf breakfast @ e coffee shop.. yeah it was gd. After that, I went over to grandma's. Did a lot of slacking over thr.. & watched puteri gunung ledang. It's a v slow paced movie.. I think most pple ard our age wont be able to stand it's cliche, stupidity n e dialogue.

Well.. the moment Im ending typing dis.. it'd be Sunday. So I'd be blogging thru e weekend. Haha. Cheerz~ *Smooch* *Smooch*

I woke up after dreaming that I've bought a piano.. hahah. I've always wanted to learn it. but apparently my parents tot that learning abacus wud be more beneficial to my child mind. Now that im older.. it's more of procastination, den anything else.

So..anihoo.. I visited yusry's frend, Aiman's blog.. and I was rewarded.. Coz I was laughing hysterically (.. I know, not a pretty picture ain't it?)!
His tagboard was somewhat spammed.. and..hahah.. it was a whole load of crap.. what abt some MPPJ telekom football team .. lyk I mean who has the actual time to sit in front of the monitor spouting rubbish for 5 whole minz? YIKEZ!

I'm juz glad that no1 has bothered to waste his/her time to actualli do likewise to mine.. teehee ~

Now I'm in a better mood, thx to MPPJ telekoms.. let's talk abt the latest thing that I'm eyeing.For those of you who are not always obsessed abt designer gds.. den what I'm talking abt might be totally of alien concept to you.. however,I...(yes me..).. have found a cartier watch look alike! yes..it's from the latest design frm e jewelry-watch maker.

This watch (not e real one.. but e 1 i found) has:
*Real leather strap
*Swarovski crystals for the dials N e slides
*Is available in pink/blue...


I juz so lyk it.. haiz...

Well.. That was yesterday.. so today is already the 9 of december. Which means 15 more days, roughly ard 2more wks til christmas n 22 days to new yr.

Time juz flies.. but I juz love the christmas season.I love the fact that wherver I m at, I can juz listen to christmas jingles.. there r holidaes sale...and orchard rd is lighted up tat u may even overlook e traffic lights!

And it keeps on raining everyday.. It's juz screaming of romance! Like u know cuddling over a cup of hot coffee/choc.. LOL.Im reading too much of romance novels.

Well.. for those of us mere single mortals.. let's tk it as a consolidation that thr's always e nw yr to party to..

.. & that's wen I'll be bzily thinking bout new yr resolutions.. (But that'll be for another day..)

Till den, smooch smooch to all. Happie holidaes.

I had a nicey day out today with Ah-boy. It's fun..
Den im so dead tired..coz I washed n folded clothes, den go vacuumed..N washed e dishes..
I'm feeling down. I feel ugly.. Oh God.I juz feel so sad..like I dont know whr my personal's life heading. Don't get me wrong, I njoy being single.. but I think Im feeling too empty inside la.. It's a very depressing hollow emotion.. it's even made worse by e nx song:

I couldn't tell you why she felt that way,
She felt it everyday.
And I couldn't help her,
I just watched her make the same mistakes again.

What's wrong, what's wrong now?
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.

Open your eyes and look outside, find the reasons why.
You've been rejected, and now you can't find what you left behind.
Be strong, be strong now.
Too many, too many problems.
Don't know where she belongs, where she belongs.
She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.

Her feelings she hides.
Her dreams she can't find.
She's losing her mind.
She's fallen behind.
She can't find her place.
She's losing her faith.
She's fallen from grace.
She's all over the place.
Yeah,oh

She wants to go home, but nobody's home.
It's where she lies, broken inside.
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside.

She's lost inside, lost inside...oh oh yeah
She's lost inside, lost inside...oh oh yeah
=====================================================================================

Sometimes.. you learn to smile.. when even frowning hurts too much..
you learn to laugh juz not to cry...

Save me from myself..

I had a weird dream today. It's pretty senseless, but I'll talk abt it aniwae. The LRT shop became an indian owned one in my dream. It's super weird..& it sells lingerie.. Dreamt I bought 2 reali sexy ones.. teehhee..=D And an uncle was asking me abt nursing in the LRT (in reality, pple wud onli stare, but wont sae aniting)

And after waking up..I realised I haven actualli tok abt Raya.hahah. I'll do it once my pix r developed alritey?? toodle dee...

boo! bet i didnt scare any of you..
Im finally back in SG.Im finally back online. My attachments r over! My exam results r out.. I can finally breathe!

You would be happie to know im having my holz.. unlike my dearest frenz in Ngee Ann.. Teehee~Im such a meanie.

And i almoz gaf up blogging if nt 4 e fact tat I realised I'd be free to dis whole mth during my vacation.

I can't believe im onli left wif a mere 6 mths or less b4 being named a Staff Nurse. Sheesh!But I guess every1 will have to go thru it some day..

Other den that, I had a gr8 time @KL.Tho it was such a short trip, I felt gd being away frm hm for a while. Being away frm hm gives u a sense of liberty, relief & serenity that I've often longed for when Im here.
Being dere, rids me of my history, of my given identity, of my endless insecurities. Im always glad to be back home.. but sometimes its gd to be away even frm the best things in life.

When Im not here, I learn to be grateful of my blessings. Learn to accept & learn from mistakes made. I get to reflect on things I've often brushed aside. To finally sleep & dream w/out nightmares..

To you who's reading this.. I'm gonna say sorry, to those deserving.. To the wonderful company that i've lost n forgot N to say a million thx to those who have loved n cared, often w/out judgements or wat if's.

I'm being such an emo freak. I know. But hey.. they say honesty's always the best policy..

1 thing's for sure.. I've missed my bed!!! hehehe..

BTW, you guys can tell me if my new skin is ME.. coz i fell in love @ 1st sight.. If onli I cud sae e same when it comes to guys....


Does it look like me??? tee...heee..
*winkz*